This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about breastfeeding when you have more than one child. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!
I've never had the opportunity to breastfeed multiple children at once but I do now have to parent my older kiddo while nursing my baby. At first this was a challenge but within just a couple weeks we got in to a groove and he knows that mommy is nursing the baby and that mommy gave him that same special attention when he was a baby. It's time he gets to read and play on his own.
I started explaining before Baby K arrived that Monkey was going to have to play quietly and be nice while mommy was feeding the baby. Monkey has attended LLL meetings and what not as long as he could remember so he knew exactly what was going on. I received this book:
when I was around 20 or so weeks pregnant and read it to Monkey a lot (the link links you to my Amazon Affiliate account-any books or items you purchase using my Amazon Affiliate ID gives me a small percentage back which I use to buy homeschooling books-thanks for supporting a family in need while my hubby attends grad school!). It is very pro breastfeeding and shows pictures of mommy breastfeeding, babywearing (and even a babywearing daddy!), baby cosleeping in a Cosleeper (we use a bassinet at the foot of our bed for the first few months and then with Monkey used a monitor next to his crib so I could wake up and feed him or take care of him before he cried and with Baby K his crib is in our room), etc. He knew that the baby was going to take a lot of Mommy's time but Mommy did the same things when Monkey was a baby. He seemed fine with that. It obviously did take adjustment but he did get used to it.
One other thing that I found helped was I got him a baby doll. This is the one I got:
He is a plushy soft baby. I love that he looks a lot like Monkey-fair skinned, blonde hair. Monkey still loves to play with his baby and have me swaddle him and sometimes wrap him on his back-he'll be a sweet Daddy someday! Hubby was very bugged by the whole baby thing at first but found it hilarious (though slightly disturbing-his words) when Monkey tried to nurse the baby. I explained that's what a kid will do when he's around Mommy all day. I also explained that he was just trying to love his baby and take care of the baby the way Mommy does. I would prefer him to "nurse" his baby (and yes we've had the discussion that the Mommy feeds the baby and the Daddy loves and cuddles the baby and changes diapers-though Hubby has only changed 2 diapers of Baby K's) than to stick a bottle in the baby's mouth because I hope that he'll someday encourage and support his wife through breastfeeding instead of getting offended that he can't take a turn. He sees Daddy bonding with his brother in other ways besides giving the baby a bottle. ***I'm not saying there's anything wrong with bottles. There are reasons why bottles may be good and there are some babies that absolutely can't nurse. I'm not trying to offend anyone. Because of my rough experience with Monkey in the beginning I have decided not to introduce bottles at all unless I for some reason need to be away from my baby. Monkey sipped at a bottle a little a couple times when he was baby sat for us to go on a date alone. Baby K has yet to need one but if I do leave him sometime I will leave a bottle but I won't ever stay away too long-I had a bad bad experience with going away to a company party with Hubby when Monkey was about 6 months and I was in excruciating pain missing a couple feedings. Bottles aren't for us but we do have a few kicking around for an emergency.***
I think an older child watching their sibling being breastfed teaches them that each kid is important to Mommy and Daddy and that we can wait for some things. Occasionally Monkey's needs do have to come first (mainly going to the potty or getting a quick snack at least if we've been away for a while) and Baby K has to wait but generally I teach that the baby's needs are more important right now and that we all have to wait sometimes for things.
Here are more post by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.
- Xela @ The Happy Hippie Homemaker-How Tandem Nursing Saves My Sanity!
- Ashley @ Adventures with my Monkeys-Breastfeedng Carnival Day 9: Breastfeeding and Multiples
- Sylko @ Chaotic Mama-Breastfeedng Carnival Day 9
- Natasha @ Natural Urban Mama-Our version of "Milk Sharing"!
- Timbra @ Bosoms and Babes-Tandem Mommyhood
- Christina @ From One Momma to Another-Breastfeeding and Multiples: Breastfeeding Cafe
- Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl-How Breastfeeding Through Pregnancy Helps ME
- And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s blog today is Heather Simpson-Breastfeeding My Toddler Through Pregnancy
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